Hello, Houseguests. Welcome to Big Brother! We have eleven competitors ready to enter the Casa and compete for the title of Last Player Standing. Here’s the final list of players:

Barnaby Winstringham
Corliss Blackbeard
El Burro Rosa
Gnopükindabak Crockett
Gone With the Blimp
Kellifer Lumbermuffins
Meredith Monstergumby
Orgulas Proudfoot
Randy Boxer
Silver Berzerker
Till Goldworthy

I’m a little sad we never got a Ham-Hands Brant in there somewhere, but otherwise this looks to be an outstanding group of players. You guys should all have received an email to your player addresses from me, and I’ll make a post soon that lists everyone’s email and put it on the sidebar.

Now that everyone’s in, let’s get to your first Head of Household Competition! Houseguests, the power is up for grabs. It’s called The Spread, and it’s modified slightly from one originally developed by Spookymilk (get ready to hear me say that a lot this season).

Everyone starts with zero points, and each “day”, everyone is given twenty points to spread around, positively or negatively. You can give or take away points from as many people as you want, but you can’t give or take away from yourself. You can only use whole integers; no half points or fractions.

For example, you could:

Give four points each to Orgulas, Randy, and Silver
Subtract three each from Till and Blimp
Subtract two points from Crockett.

There will be four “days” of spreading. I’ll make an ongoing results post and, each “day”, will update the current point standings, but won’t make public anyone’s individual point moves. At the end of the four periods, the player with either the highest or lowest point total who has a greater difference between themselves and the next highest or lowest player will win HOH. (For example, if Meredith has the most with 60, Kellifer has 58, Barnaby is lowest at -34 and Corliss is next with -26, Barnaby wins.) If there’s a tie between the differences on both ends, the player with the highest or lowest absolute number will win. (So if Corliss instead had -32 in that example, Meredith would win.) If there’s still a tie, HOH will be randomly selected between the tied players, because Big Brother does plenty of random and arbitrary things.

For the first period, I’ll give you a couple days, since you’re all getting to know your fellow Houseguests for the first time. You’ll have until Thursday at 9:00 PM Central to send me your first spreads. After that, the periods will last for one full 24 hour day, so the last period will end Sunday. If everyone gets their spreads in before the end of the period, of course, I can get the next one started earlier.

Now, a word about non-submissions in this season. Since by the time we get to voting, the people you can vote for are going to be limited, it’s not going to be as simple to penalize nonsubs with self-votes as in Survivor. Here’s what I’ve thought up, to experiment with, and we’ll see how it goes. (Hopefully, none of it will ever apply, because you’ll all participate fully, right?!?) Any nonsub for any part of the game will receive one strike. Missing a submission for a challenge, not casting a vote when required to, the HOH not meeting the deadline for nominations, will all get one strike. After a player gets two strikes, they will receive a penalty nomination for the next voting cycle they’re eligible for. If a player gets to four strikes, they will be automatically eliminated from the game.

On this challenge, since it should go pretty fast, we’ll say that if you miss two spread periods, you will be counted as an official nonsub, be ineligible to win this HOH, and will receive one strike.

In general, if you guys, as you carry out your strategic discussions or whatever, could BCC me on those, that would be great. If anyone out there wants to get in on the “watcher” list for this season, let me know.

I think that’s all for now. I’m sure if I forgot something important, someone will remind me. Cheers, Houseguests!