Welcome, Survivors, to the first of our double eliminations. We’ll start with Tools… If anyone would like to play an idol, now is the time. No one? Ok.

Vote 1: Dave, Circa Tuesday. More like Dave the Dud.

Vote 2: Mitosis

Vote 3: I vote for Dave. Not that I have anything against him, but I keep forgetting he is on my team which is probably reason enough.

Vote 4: Cellular Mitosis

Vote 5: Mitosis

Vote 6: Dave

Vote 7: Dave. There’s a day-of-the-week joke that I could probably make, but I won’t.

Vote 8: Mitosis. 5 days worth of discussing, strategizing, contemplating and agonizing…5 days! 11 rounds! Multiple choices to be made in each and every one of them. And this is what we got from you: “Sorry everyone – busy day. I’ll check in tonight!” “I’m here to everyone. Sorry it’s so late, checking on our progress.” “Good job everyone! I hope to be around more tomorrow! See you all then!”. [Lists 8 more comments.] Thanks Mitosis….but no thanks.

Vote 9: Cellular Mitosis. Sorry you had to split.

Our 13th elimination is Jon “Cellular Mitosis” Roberts. He’s my cousin. Another n00b. And he’s just in college. But you guys are bound and determined to continue targeting the recruits, no matter that it makes you bullies. I hope you’re happy!

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Alright, with that little rant out of the way… let’s move on to Synergy. If anyone wants to play an idol…

Honey Bunches of Donald start coughing.
“You ok Donald?”
“NO I’M DAMN WELL NOT OKAY. I’VE BEEN SITTING ON THIS BOOK FOR TOO LONG! HERE. YOU HAVE IT!”
He tosses me a signed copy of John Hodgman’s Areas Of My Expertise. This is, in fact, an immunity idol. Any votes cast for Honey Bunches Of Donald will not count.

Vote 1: HBOD (that’s Honey Bunches of Donald). Sometimes playing this game means hurting the ones ya love. 😦

Vote 2: Donald

Vote 3: Honey Bunches of Donald

Vote 4: Honey Bunches of Donald

Vote 5: A Really Scary Mummy

Vote 6: The Really Scary Mummy. Because he’s really scary.

Vote 7: A Really Scary Mummy

Vote 8: I vote for A Very Scary Mummy. The stench of his musty old wrappings is really starting to build up in the chat room. I can’t imagine how bad it would be if ol’ Skunkbait Jones was still in there, too.

Vote 9: I vote HBOD. Sorry, big guy, I’m going to miss your style.

No, voter 9. No you won’t. Because all of those votes for Donald were tossed out (and won’t count against him for future tie-breaker purposes either, so that’s clear), and instead, Alan “A Really Scary Mummy” Briggs is being sent home as our 14th elimination. That’s right. Another new recruit.

THIS. THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS, CdLERS!

Sigh. Jon and Alan are both awesome guys. They both did remarkably well and should be very proud of how they played. I’m sad to see them go, and I hope they stick around and check out the site. Maybe join up over on the Cutthroat Junction stuff, or at least play again some time. They deserve another shot. And since they’ve played before, maybe you guys will be nice this time? You damn neophobes.

I’m going to be posting a “Hide Yourself/Best Character Vote” later tonight. That’s all that will happen over the weekend. Due Sunday night at 9. Enjoy the time away, Survivors. This was a brutal week that you all made it through.

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