This was a good week, gang. Isolation is a favorite story and song element of mine, for whatever reason, so I was hoping for a lot, and we got it. There are still just ten of you this week, but whatever. You’ve been a blast.
Up next is another episode you’ve heard of, even if your introduction to it came from “The Simpsons”:
“Nightmare at 20,000 Feet”
Written by Richard Matheson
Directed by Richard Donner
First broadcast Oct. 11, 1963
Future Enterprise Captain William Shatner appeared twice on “The Twilight Zone” – once as a newlywed who becomes too trusting of a fortune-telling machine (“Nick of Time”), and then in this all-time classic by Richard Matheson.
Shatner played an airline passenger just recovered from a nervous breakdown who is convinced he has spotted a bizarre creature tearing apart the plane. It’s a story full of energy anchored by a man desperate to prove to himself that he is not going crazy.
Part of me wants to force you to write a story around the line “There’s something on the wing. Some…thing.” Seems a bit cruel, though.
You will write a story where a single character is aware of impending trouble. That’s all I want to give you, as anything else might steer you too strongly in a specific direction.
Cheers, Prosers.
Casa de Leche 
20 comments
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December 12, 2016 at 7:33 pm
ash10101
I had severe issues with that one. I wrote it three times and couldn’t figure out how to make it work so I just ended up with that.
December 12, 2016 at 7:33 pm
ash10101
I did enjoy writing something happy for once though
December 13, 2016 at 7:37 am
freealonzo
Busted. Kelly definitely your experiences at Best Buy was my inspiration. Also “snake oil salesman” never even crossed my mind. Thankfully.
December 13, 2016 at 9:02 am
spookymilk
It felt like it had to be, as the character’s specific gripes were so familiar. I’m about to head to work in -7 degree weather, so I expect more of the same.
December 13, 2016 at 8:54 am
christinapepper
Arrrrrrrrgh! I knew I didn’t have enough room to tell the story I wanted to tell, but I also didn’t have another idea. So it goes.
December 13, 2016 at 9:02 am
spookymilk
That’s the worst.
Actually, the worst is when that happens, and then a couple of days later you have an even better idea for the prompt when there’s nothing you can do about it.
December 13, 2016 at 11:30 am
nettiebarron
Scoring is updated. Congrats, Colin, on the season’s first triple gold!
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1KAPUZf2L0hjIw38FFtcDRIfWAyZEHZ4VM9AQuWUgm8A/edit#gid=0
December 13, 2016 at 11:44 am
infantsquirrel
I don’t think it stuck!
December 13, 2016 at 12:01 pm
nettiebarron
Wha? Did I goof?
December 14, 2016 at 11:14 am
infantsquirrel
Yeah, you forgot to change my bronzes and blank spaces to gold! 😉
December 13, 2016 at 11:42 am
infantsquirrel
Matthew got it – it was a story about my dad’s death. He died in our house (our new house, his old house) and I’ve been hearing things in the corner where his hospice bed was. 🙂
December 13, 2016 at 2:18 pm
uberminz
The hints at the passage of time is what drove it home for me.
December 14, 2016 at 11:13 am
infantsquirrel
I was happy that you got it. 🙂 I struggle with the two kinds of feedback I seem to always get: it’s either “you revealed too much; don’t spoon feed the reader” or “come on! not enough is revealed here!”. I removed a sentence at the end which would have given it away (it was as simple as “I am dead”, I believe) but I thought it would diminish what I was trying to do with the fogginess of the story. Since February, when he died, I have imagined death to be this confusing, foggy state that the deceased many not understand at first.
About a month ago I was coming down the stairs to let Maggie (the shitty garbage puggle) out at 2 am and I heard – I swear on my fucking LIFE I heard it – my dad’s raspy, esophageal-cancer voice yell out, “MARY!” from the corner of the living room where his hospice bed had been (this is where he died). My very first thought, even before the astonishment and disbelief, was “oh, dad must be confused!” (Mary is my mom’s name). It’s kind of beautiful that our brains retain that reptilian driver that never really accepts that people are gone… and I still have these knee-jerk responses when I see a book he’d want, or when tuna is on sale and think I should get some for him (his cat is a tuna whore, the bad jokes write themselves).
Anyway, my big inspiration here was that my SECOND thought after thinking he was confused was *MIND NUMBING FEAR*. I was afraid, even knowing that I thought I heard my dad’s voice. And the next day I was ashamed, but every night since then I’ve been afraid to go down through the living room at night. Of all the things I should not fear, I fear hearing my dead dad’s voice in the living room. It’s sad and it makes me really ashamed of myself, because my dad and I were beyond close – we were like twins, born on the same day – so letting the “me” character get an okay from the ghost-dad (NOT BILL COSBY NOT BILL COSBY) was a little therapeutic for me. Anyway.
December 17, 2016 at 6:03 pm
mybiggirlshoes
I give this a triple gold. ❤️
December 16, 2016 at 7:16 pm
The Dread Pirate
Colin’s story was so good that he managed to sneak a missing semicolon past spooky in the VERY FIRST SENTENCE.
Also, no one writes dark stories with cheerful characters better than Shawn.
December 17, 2016 at 6:06 pm
mybiggirlshoes
I’m a cheerful, miserable shell of a person.
December 19, 2016 at 6:18 pm
mbnovak
My best dark story with cheerful characters was inspired by Shawn.
January 3, 2017 at 8:23 pm
mybiggirlshoes
I miss you, Matt! Remember when we were a team????
January 3, 2017 at 8:26 pm
mbnovak
We were so young… You still are, of course. I can ascribe that to all the innocents you slaughter in your writing, no?
January 3, 2017 at 8:28 pm
mbnovak
Also, there was that time I wanted to be a team again, but you didn’t trust me and let Bizek waltz to the win. That was a good result too though.