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It’s a long one, but it’s a good time.

The players: Kelly Wells, Brooks Maki, Annette Barron, Christina Pepper, Dan Kautz.

There’s a lot of Novak-cracking and we run through each elimination, giving them way more importance than they probably had. The wine flows freely, and so do the jokes. Pepper reveals her bedtime, and somehow we still manage to shoehorn in a few Bret jokes at the end. Enjoy!

Alright, Survivors. It all comes down to this.

Vote 1:
As usual in anonymous survivor, there were a lot of shifting alliances but the finalists were the ones that had the most solid alliance. Excellent games by both Pie and Gaspar, I think you both deserve your spot at the final table.
I vote for Gaspar to win. He played a top tier game when his team wasn’t in a position of power. And then he played a very good game when he was in a position of power. While the Gaspar/Pie alliance no doubt had strategic contributions from both, Gaspar seemed more active in the strategy part of the game that involved other players.

Vote 2:
Eats a Lot of Pie

Hey Eatsy!
You’re wrong. You deserve to win.
Love ya!

Vote 3:
First, Pie. I had a lot of fun playing with you, and I’m glad to see that you seem to have enjoyed your time with the game. You did good. In keeping people on the side and showing patience, you proved that you’re going to be a force to be reckoned with in future games. Thanks for the good times.
Now, on to Gaspar (who has my vote, if that weren’t already obvious). We’ve been allied in pretty much every game the two of us have played, and I knew it would eventually come to this. I had hoped that there would be some thrilling involved in our endgame, with us scrambling in a mad dash to take each other out, but it wasn’t to be. Still, it was an absolute blast to watch your game from the sidelines. I know you were pretty concerned when I went, but you absolutely owned the game the whole way. Top-tier win, my friend. Beers are on me next time we meet.

Vote 4:
Congrats, Pie, on making it to the final two. It seems like that was your goal, so way to go! It’s not an easy game to maneuver and you managed to keep the paranoia at bay and make strong alliances. However, I cannot vote for you if you don’t want to win. I understand loyalty, but if you were playing to win, you would have gotten rid of Gaspar before the end. Gaspar would have understood that. It is NOT, after all, Gods and Mortals. That being said, it really doesn’t make a difference as clearly Gaspar played the stronger, more strategic game.
So my vote goes to Gaspar, but I do love me some Pie.

Vote 5:
Gaspar: He fought the good fight. And if Pie wants us to vote that way, even more of a reason!

Vote 6:
“Hey… Hey don’t you walk away from me! You don’t know who you’re dealing with! Don’t ever tell me what I can’t do, ever! This is destiny, this is destiny… This is my destiny! I’m supposed to do this, dammit! Don’t tell me what I can’t do! Don’t tell me what I can’t do! ”

Get up out of that wheelchair and claim your victory, John. I never doubted you.

Vote Gaspar Fopsworth Von Belsig

Vote 7:

Vote 8:
Rules were meant to be broken anyway. Well played and well deserved Gaspar.

Vote 9:
My vote is for Gaspar. Amazing quiz skills- damn you! (as I raise my arm and shake my little sandwich fist in outrage…….several minutes later, I sigh and shake my head.) Damn. Amazing game amigo.

Second place in Spookymilk Survivor XIV is: Eats A Lot Of Pie- CHRISTINA “PROM DATE” PEPPER.

And your winner of Spookymilk Survivor XIV is GASPAR FOPSWORTH VON BELSIG aka DAN “THE PROFESSIONAL” KAUTZ.

Pie played a fantastic game, not just for a rookie, but for anyone. Several times throughout the game she indicated to me that she felt lost. My response was always the same: You’re doing just fine, trust your instincts. Sure enough, those instincts led her to the end.

As for DK? Funny story: it was like pulling teeth to get Dan to play this game. Then, he hated the chat site so much he flirted with quitting (and may have, technically, at one point?). Then, he played one of the best all-around games I can imagine. He won challenges and had fantastic mini-game strategy. He put together incredibly strong alliances. He pitted threats against each other. The “best player never to win” has finally won. Congratulations, DK.

Here’s the link to the longest game’s longest game notes:

As has become tradition in the anonymous games, we’re going to take a moment to reflect on the previous competitors of the season, before posting the final vote (which will come around 9, and we’ll do a live finale. I’ll post a link to the live doc on the site).

Before we get to the players, let me just say that it has been an absolute honor to serve as your mod. It was a learning experience for me, and there were bumps along the way. Thank you all for your grace and patience, for your open communication with me, and for helping me along the way. You all invested a ton in this game, and I couldn’t have asked for a more understanding group of players. It is, quite simply, a privilege to have moderated this game.

Thank you, too, to Adobery and Andy Rustleund, for all of the help they contributed to this game. Andy did an amazing job on the chat site – far more than I could have ever asked – and Adobery contributed so much behind the scenes assistance, as well as the pogs and other game development. Those two were awesome.

Finally, I’d also like to thank, very specifically, Spooky for giving me this opportunity. He has put so much work into the site, the games, the community – and he’s always constantly still working on these things. For him to have created this, much less given me a chance to watch over his baby… wow. Thanks Kelly.

Alright, now, let’s get to the players. Mathasaurus! has graciously provided a bit of insider commentary. It should be fun, gang!

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Here are the Jury Questions and the answers. Jury, you have until 9 p.m. Tuesday to submit a vote for the person you want to win. Feel free to write comments or not. Thanks.


Gaspar: When you learned that previous votes no longer mattered at the last second, potentially saving you, what was your honest reaction?

I was pleased to see Matt bringing the game here even more in line with the original Survivor show, for one thing. The show hasn’t used previous votes as a tiebreaker in a long, long time, for good reason, and I like anything that makes our game closer to feeling like “real” Survivor. I’ve even come around on the utility of Diplochat for that reason, despite my early healthy skepticism.

Pie and I had worked out a couple ideas for a more aggressive approach to attempt to bait Humberto into voting for her, while I suggested to Humberto that a Pie vote was our best strategic plan. Once we knew a tie wouldn’t be immediately fatal, we went more conservative with our messages. I figured either way Humberto was still likely to be voting for me, so I was mostly just relieved and grateful that if I lost at four, it wouldn’t be solely because of a couple stray votes that had been tossed on me early after the merge.

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That was amazing, Survivors. Amazing.

Vote 1: Pie (Humberto’s)

Vote 2: Humberto (Pie’s)

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Go look at the document.

It was amazing. There were supposed to be 20 question. Sudden death tiebreaker if it was needed. 8 tie breaker questions later, we had a winner. Humberto fought an amazing fight, but Gaspar Fopsworth von Belsig takes home the final immunity. Pie and Humberto will vote for each other automatically, so Gasapr must cast a vote for who he wants to eliminate.

Our final challenge will happen at 8:30 p.m. on Thursday. It will be a live quiz. I will create a common document, on which I will post a question. The Survivors will then have 1 minute to answer the question (either by e-mail or on their own private document, shared with me). I will the post the answers and give a point for each right answer.

There will be 20 questions. We will end whenever one player has a mathematically insurmountable lead. If there is a tie at 20, I will continue asking questions, until there is no longer a tie. Only those players tied will participate in the tie-breaker questions.

Here is the link:

Good luck, final 3.

Alright, Survivors, which of you will be competing in the final challenge? Let’s find out.

Vote 1: Gaspar

Vote 2: Cuthbert Headlam
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Here’s the final round, Survivors:

Round 1
P: AF (3)
P: BF (2)
G: AA (UR)
C: AF (2)
G: UH (2)
H: BF (2)
H: AA (Rare)
C: AA (reg)

Round 2
C: AF (3)
C: AF (2)
G: AF (1)
P: AA (Rare)
P: BF (2)
H: AF (1)
G: UH (3)
H: UH (2)

Round 3
P: AA (rare)
H: AA (reg)
C: BF (3)
H: AF (3)
G: BF (2)
P: AF (2)
G: AA (reg)
C: BF (1)

Player summaries and final results, after the jump.
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Here are the current boards:

Round 6 of 7 is complete. The next round is due at 9 p.m. on Friday. Players should anticipate noon and 9 p.m. deadlines every day until this challenge is complete.

Your competition, and also you



I: Rachel “The Double-Dealer” Flynn

II: Ryan “The Snake” Fossum

III: Patrick “The Gentleman” Kozicky

IV: Brienne “The Submitter” Maner

V: Rusty “The Porn Star” Greene

VI: Brooks “The Unlikely Hero” Maki

VII: William “The Soulful” Schuth

VIII: Brooks “The Survivor” Maki

IX: Zack “The Ice Cream Man” Sauvageau

X: Pete “The Vacuum Cleaner” Bruzek

Turbo: Brooks “The 1956-1979 Montreal Canadiens” Maki

XI: Matt “The Cold-Hearted Motherf*&^er” Novak

All-Stars (XII): Andy “The Quiet Man” Rustleund

XIII: Sarah “Clarence’s Hope” Bizek

XIV: Dan “The Professional” Kautz

XV: Christina “Assault And” Pepper

XVI: Matt “The First-Time Player” Novak

XVII: Stacy “Saintly Patience” Snell

XVIII: Brian “Checkmate” David

XIX: Annette “Eammon for the Top” Barron

XX: Daniel “Neville “Smash “Hardware” Hardwood” Longbottom” Caouette

XXI: Pete “The Comeback Kid” Bruzek

XXII: Dan “The Even More Professional” Kautz

XXIII: Melissa “Don’t You (Forget About Me)” David

XXIV: Stacy “Fucking” Snell

I: Dragging Rivet’s Name Through the Mud One Last Time: Matt Novak (Ultragrandpa) and Michael Rivet (Friph Flipher-Fiph)
II: Bahambo Number 5: Pete “Triple Crown” Bruzek and Michelle “Single Tiara…So Far” Pratt

I: Brooks “Oh, for the Love of God” Maki
II: Michael “#DDB” Rivet
III: Pete “Fortune’s Fool” Bruzek
IV: Erin “All Seven and We’ll Watch Them Fall” Leslie
V: Jake “Littlefinger” Elliott

2014: Brooks “The Creator” Maki
2015: Matt “The Artist” Novak
2016: Matt “Waited Them Out” Novak
2017: Annette “I Would’ve Voted for You” Barron

2013: #21 Greg “The Gallant Glutton of Greatness” Johnson
2014: #29 Jonathon “Big Papa” Pope
2015: #8 Christina “Am I in This?” Pepper
2016: #22 Annette “No Backs Stabbed” Barron
2017: #30 Bernice “The Vulture” Nicaise
2018: #17 Carrie “Solid Gold” Bard
2019: #16 Jake “The Jabroni” Elliott

(Writing, non-elimination)
I: Sarah “Centipede Face” Johnson
II: Sarah “The Johnson Eliminator” Wreisner
III: Colin “Lonely Old Moon” Woolston
IV: Melissa “Not Sidebar Material” Diamond
V: Sama “No Family Reunions” Smith
VI: Sarah “Tumor Face” Wreisner
VII: John “Cult Following” Wreisner
VIII: Joshua “Peed the Bed” Longman
VIII: Annette “Oh, Right, That’s Who Won” Barron

WEREWOLF (most recent)

Werewolf Stats Spreadsheet

I (Pure): Matthew “The Obsessor” Gilman
I (Power): Kelly “The Novak-Destroyer” Wells

I: Matt “Exploiter of Worlds” Novak (France)

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