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What a season, gang. Sort of. The pre-merge stands as one of the best ever, and the post-merge stands as…one of the most predictable ever, from the outside. Players suddenly had an aversion to improving their lots, it seemed, by doing anything at all besides writing. However, there were still a few players who played some strong post-merge games. Let’s see which of these folks was considered to be one of them.

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We’re here! I’m fielding questions and moves from Survivor XVI players, though, so let’s dispense with the long opening and save it all for the winner announcement tomorrow night.

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Erik and Pepper, here you go. Answer these and add anything else you want in a plea not to exceed 1000 words. There will be no word limit on responses to questions, as I trust you both know the line between explanation and logorrhea. Fun Fact: Chrome is not smart enough to know the word “logorrhea.” Maybe that’s an intentional thing on their part to eradicate it. OOOOHHHH, META

Should I get to the questions? I should get to the questions.

For Erik

When you started this game, who were your final 5, 4, 3 and 2? Is that how the game turned out? If not, what happened along the way to change your plans?

What would you consider to be your pivotal strategic move this season that got you to the finals?

Given her immunity run, do you regret not eliminating Christina with five players left? Why do you think you deserve to win more than Christina?

Were you loyal to Christina throughout the game, or did you consider (and/or act on) getting rid of her at any point?

What do you consider to be your greatest moment as far as your writing goes?

For Christina

When you started this game, who were your final 5, 4, 3 and 2? Is that how the game turned out? If not, what happened along the way to change your plans?

What would you consider to be your pivotal move this season that got you to the finals?

Were you loyal to Erik throughout the game, or did you consider (and/or act on) getting rid of him at any point?

Why do you think you deserve to win more than Erik?

What do you consider to be your greatest moment as far as your writing goes?

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There you go. Have at it, finalists. I want these by tomorrow night by…really late because I’ll be at a Diamondbacks game unless you ask for more.

It’s time for the final vote of the season, folks. Uh, the final vote that doesn’t involve the jury. Except for the fact that the votee becomes a juror. You know what? You know what’s f*&^ing going on, so stop expecting me to hold your hands through this. Let’s get to it.

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Alright, Survivors. We laughed, we cried…well, did we cry? Maybe once or twice. It’s tough to get there. Let’s move on. We did our yearly Brooks-inspired finale, and as was true all season long, the concepts worked. Each story could have used punching up (all in different ways) but each was satisfying in various ways as well. Though this won’t go down as the best final ever – season VIII has that distinction – it was a fun ride and a fair ending to a shockingly well-attended season (though Leif’s nonsub, as we know now, had far-reaching implications).

Let’s do this, Survivors. Game faces.
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Alright, gang, I got here a bit earlier than I thought I would. You’re welcome!

There was some good fun to be had with this one. Time to see which plan won out.

Vote One: Annette Barron. “Annette the Barron Krauss von Espy”

Vote Two: Erik S.
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Oooohhh. Good job here, ladies and gents. For as much as some of you loathed this challenge – and I can’t begrudge you, because I thought it sounded tough even as I pitched it – you all soared to some degree in this one. The ideas were great and the structure was fantastic. I suppose that could be a byproduct of the lack of the word limit? Well, whatever it was, y’all made us proud this time around, and have made it an exciting final four.
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Alright, Survivors. It’s time to break the trend of someone getting one vote while someone else gets all the others. Did you have surprises in you, or at the very least, intrigue? I sure as hell hope so, because as usual, I’m cranky after a travel day.

Vote One: Jack Haas.

Vote Two: Jack Haas. “I got nothin here…”

Vote Three: Christina Pepper. “Got to try something.”

Vote Four: Christina Pepper. “*Sigh* Pepper; but I am going to require therapy after this game.​”

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Here we are, kiddos, with your third to last story. Depravity and darkness abound this week, in a season that really hasn’t been that dark. I have to dispense with further commentary, as I leave for Minnesota early tomorrow and have loads of packing to do.
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Well, Survivors, have you had your fill of unanimous votes? I guess it’s time to find out. It’s such a strange thing to see at the end of a Survivor game, frankly, though I suppose everything will become clear to the victims once the game is over and players explain themselves.

At any rate, let’s see who’s surprised to be out tonight.

Vote One: Annette Barron. “Purely self-defense.”

Vote Two: Margaret Martin. “My vote is for Margaret; much as it pains me.”
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Your competition, and also you

HALL OF CHAMPIONS

SPOOKYMILK SURVIVOR

I: Rachel “The Double-Dealer” Flynn

II: Ryan “The Snake” Fossum

III: Patrick “The Gentleman” Kozicky

IV: Brienne “The Submitter” Maner

V: Rusty “The Porn Star” Greene

VI: Brooks “The Unlikely Hero” Maki

VII: William “The Soulful” Schuth

VIII: Brooks “The Survivor” Maki

IX: Zack “The Ice Cream Man” Sauvageau

X: Pete “The Vacuum Cleaner” Bruzek

Turbo: Brooks “The 1956-1979 Montreal Canadiens” Maki

XI: Matt “The Cold-Hearted Motherf*&^er” Novak

All-Stars (XII): Andy “The Quiet Man” Rustleund

XIII: Sarah “Clarence’s Hope” Bizek

XIV: Dan “The Professional” Kautz

XV: Christina “Assault And” Pepper

XVI: Matt “The First-Time Player” Novak

XVII: Stacy “Saintly Patience” Snell

XVIII: Brian “Checkmate” David

XIX: Annette “Eammon for the Top” Barron

XX: Daniel “Neville “Smash “Hardware” Hardwood” Longbottom” Caouette

XXI: Pete “The Comeback Kid” Bruzek

XXII: Dan “The Even More Professional” Kautz

XXIII: Melissa “Don’t You (Forget About Me)” David

XXIV: Stacy “Fucking” Snell

GODS AND MORTALS
I: Dragging Rivet’s Name Through the Mud One Last Time: Matt Novak (Ultragrandpa) and Michael Rivet (Friph Flipher-Fiph)
II: Bahambo Number 5: Pete “Triple Crown” Bruzek and Michelle “Single Tiara…So Far” Pratt

BIG BROTHER
I: Brooks “Oh, for the Love of God” Maki
II: Michael “#DDB” Rivet
III: Pete “Fortune’s Fool” Bruzek
IV: Erin “All Seven and We’ll Watch Them Fall” Leslie
V: Jake “Littlefinger” Elliott

FALL, CAESAR
2014: Brooks “The Creator” Maki
2015: Matt “The Artist” Novak
2016: Matt “Waited Them Out” Novak
2017: Annette “I Would’ve Voted for You” Barron

THE ROYAL RUMBLE
2013: #21 Greg “The Gallant Glutton of Greatness” Johnson
2014: #29 Jonathon “Big Papa” Pope
2015: #8 Christina “Am I in This?” Pepper
2016: #22 Annette “No Backs Stabbed” Barron
2017: #30 Bernice “The Vulture” Nicaise
2018: #17 Carrie “Solid Gold” Bard
2019: #16 Jake “The Jabroni” Elliott

PLAY WITH THE PROSE
(Writing, non-elimination)
I: Sarah “Centipede Face” Johnson
II: Sarah “The Johnson Eliminator” Wreisner
III: Colin “Lonely Old Moon” Woolston
IV: Melissa “Not Sidebar Material” Diamond
V: Sama “No Family Reunions” Smith
VI: Sarah “Tumor Face” Wreisner
VII: John “Cult Following” Wreisner
VIII: Joshua “Peed the Bed” Longman
VIII: Annette “Oh, Right, That’s Who Won” Barron

WEREWOLF (most recent)

Werewolf Stats Spreadsheet

PUZZLE CHALLENGE
I (Pure): Matthew “The Obsessor” Gilman
I (Power): Kelly “The Novak-Destroyer” Wells

DIPLOMACY
I: Matt “Exploiter of Worlds” Novak (France)

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